This is a story Devan and I wrote a couple of years ago. I like looking back on it, seeing my voice from a couple of years ago and seeing how we predicted what the future would be like. -Quinn P.
There was once a man by the name of Odysseus. He was an executive in an advertising firm called the Siren Advertising Co. His job was to watch the advertisements and see if they were irresistible enough. His only problem was that he was always temped too much by the ads.
One day while he was at work, Odysseus was watching a commercial about a McDonald’s Egg McMuffin. “I need to buy an Egg McMuffin!” he exclaimed. He ran out the door of his office and drove to McDonald’s. “I would like three Egg McMuffins please.”
He came back to work, eating his Egg McMuffin, and watched the next commercial. This one was about a car: The Honda Odyssey 2013. Again, he ran out of his office to the local Honda dealer and bought the new Honda Odyssey.
When Odysseus got back to the office he sat down in his chair. He realized how bad it was that he spontaneously bought a new car even though his other car only had 100 miles on it. He asked some of his coworkers to tie him to his chair so he couldn’t go and buy something else. With a few dubious looks, his coworkers tied him to his favorite office chair. Then he watched the next commercial.
This one was about the new Apple iPhone 7. He tried to get out of his chair, screeching in agony as his brain was eaten up by the desire of owning the new iPhone, but he couldn’t because he was tied to his chair. Odysseus screamed, “I must get the new iPhone! Help! I must get it!”
He swung his arms back and forth to slowly move across the room. He finally got to the door and opened it. Next, he fell down the stairs, which broke the ropes tying up his legs. Odysseus turned his chair to face backward, and pushed with his feet to get himself moving. He sped along the many roads leading to the Apple store not even stopping for red lights. A police car chased after him, but he outran it. When he wheeled to the Apple store, he bought the iPhone 7 from a confused salesperson.
Once he got back, he realized that he had bought yet another thing because of a commercial. This time he asked his coworkers this time to tie him to the desk. Odysseus watched the last commercial. It was about a medication to improve sleeping. “AHHHH!” he wailed. “Let me go! I need to ask if this medication is right for me! Or just let me get it from the pharmacy, I don’t care, I just have to buy it!”
The terrified coworkers ran out of the room, but as hard as Odysseus tried, he couldn’t escape from his desk. Eventually, his crazed mind settled down and his coworkers could untie him. “Thanks guys,” he said. “That was the last commercial I’ll have to watch because I just got promoted. Now I just have to say our slogan; ‘We call you to our products.’”
And Odysseus lived for the rest of his life, happily reciting the Siren Advertising Co. slogan.